Blue to the Bone

Photo Source: https://pixabay.com/en/two-hearts-red-heart-love-symbol-631344/

When Chelsea was born 21 years ago today, I knew the second she came into the world she would be a force to be reckoned with.  She didn't cry.  She had to be tapped on the bottom with the doctor’s first two fingers before she started to sound like a sweet little lamb.  (It wasn't the last time she would be tapped on the bottom for her rebellious nature!)  But that cry had a certain tone to it – it was different and I knew it right away.

Every night when Chelsea was little, she and I had a ritual after her night-time bath.  I would blow dry her hair and sing a song I knew from when I was a kid called Blue to the Bone.  I have no idea where I learned it or how I knew it – just seemed like it had always been there.  When the blow dryer would go, I would sing it to Chelsea and by the time the song was done, her hair would be dry.  One night, she started to sing it first.  Her voice sounded just so pretty – and she was so stinkin’ cute!  So I started to sing with her, only I added harmony.  Much to my surprise she held her own and a beautiful sound emerged from the lovely acoustics of the bathroom!  (oxy-moronic statement much?)

For my birthday one year, Adrian got a friend of ours, Vic Mignona, to record us singing this song.  He had a recording studio in his home and he does a lot of professional production work, among other things.  Vic added some music and even had Adrian add some bass to the end chorus!  (Picture “Daddy Sang Bass” a la Johnny Cash!)

It was a wonderful gift, as was Chelsea being born.  I still listen to it and when I do, I can’t believe my Little Lamb is all grown up.  She has been through very hard times with grace, and it has pushed her faith to the limit.  But that little rebel never let those times make her blue to the bone.  Instead she created her own song in life, realizing that the decisions she made would create her legacy – understanding life is not always beautiful harmony, but to make the most for every bit of it and be thankful for the opportunity to have a purpose here in this life.

Happy Birthday, Chelsea Dane.  I love you.  Thank you for making my life better.

Here is the recording of Chelsea and I singing Blue to the Bone (featuring Adrian singing bass at the end): 

BlueToTheBone

Sheila Garcia Chelsea Erickson

Phyllis & Ellie

Copyright 1976 American Broadcasting Company (ABC)

It doesn't matter who you are or where you've been.  A friendship that stands the test of time means there was a solid foundation that it rested upon.  I believe there is a season for people that come and go in your life…that they were meant to be there during a time that you needed them, whether you think so or not.  Maybe it was to teach you something, or maybe it was just because you needed that caliber of love and encouragement you were given.  But then there are those that no matter what happens or where you are in your life, you know they will always be there – be a part of your life…a special part of your heart.

 There once was a woman with a calling.  She had a love affair with what she believed was right in her faith and followed it.  She gave up the world as we know it to serve and felt that at that time is was very right.  As she progressed in this calling, she met someone who felt the same calling to the same faith to the same place in her soul she felt was right.  And they became friends.  They became the kind of friends I just talked about – the loyalty and love ran thicker and tighter than any circumstance they could have ever faced.

 The rules of the faith they followed changed their names, though their spirits remained the same.  Their kinship continued to grow as they did.  They each faced trials and tribulations that brought them to places in their life most of us understand, but hope we never have to go through.  And with each moment of perseverance they had to face, they were molded and changed into different people – and their friendship remained. 

 At different times, they were roommates, friends, sisters(both in their faith and to each other), women of faith, strength in numbers, healthy and viral, and sensitive to each other’s needs – and not just under the cloak of a habit…it was more than that; meaningful and intentional.  And then, at other times, they were alone, distant, found themselves following different spiritual paths, strength in their individuality, and – sickness found each of them, though each with a different name.

 As their families grew, names were given to them based on the originality of who they were.  One’s nephew called her by her birth-given name, Phyllis.  The same nephew became the other’s godson, and as a child was unable to pronounce the name everyone knew, so in his child-like way, he called her “Ellie” – as close as he could get.

 Phyllis and Ellie went in different directions as life took them to the places they landed and became comfortable…but their friendship never wavered.  From the time they were 14-year-old-girls until well into their prime, they remained strong on the foundation they had built.  As life happens, one had to deal with Alzheimer’s and the other, Cancer.  Sometimes the things life brings you can tear down even the oldest of friendships – but only if your foundation isn't solid and tangible.  Phyllis and Ellie stood strong.  Often they would be there for one another if they could, but for Phyllis, Alzheimer’s took over her mind,  and then her body so she did the very best she could.  Ultimately, the disease took her life.  Ellie fought Cancer and still fights as I type this story, but has not let it get the very best of her.

 Ellie went to be with Phyllis during her last few hours here on earth, and though Phyllis struggled for so long with not remembering, she knew Ellie was there and the last things Ellie said to her.  And with the peace that Ellie feels for Phyllis’ passing and not suffering any more, her heart aches the loss of her friend.  She knows she will see her again someday.  She knows the foundation is still the solidity of their life together…and that it helped create the widely-loved, strong woman she is today and will continue to be until she sees Phyllis again.

 At Phyllis’ funeral, Ellie said to her godson – Phyllis’ nephew- “I guess there is no more Phyllis and Ellie.”  To which her godson replied, “There will ALWAYS be a Phyllis and Ellie.” 

And he’s right.

 Who is the Phyllis or the Ellie in your life?  As you build your legacy and this short life passes you by, be still and decipher who that person is in your life.  Who do you have the solid foundation with that God has built Himself into?  Remember the people that have passed through and made a difference – good or bad, it’s shaped you and given you wisdom.  But always be there for the one that has helped give you solidity.  Don’t just let a habit take over……be meaningful and intentional and allow it to mold you and create the person you ultimately become.  Enjoy every moment to its absolute fullest because one day our last day will be here.  And that foundation and what it has become will be the legacy you leave……just like Phyllis and Ellie.

Mommy, Will You Marry Me?

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They're the words most girls dream of......the proposal that takes you into exciting nuptials and wedded bliss true love stories are made of; unless of course, they come from your six-year-old son.

When Cameron was about that age, we were in our usual bedtime ritual of bath, brush the teeth, put on pajamas, read a book, say our prayers, tuck that little chubby boy with his curly locks into the sheets and coverlet like he was a sausage-in-a-biscuit, kiss his forehead and say "good night".  Just as I reached the door and my hand felt for the light switch, I heard, "Mommy?"  "Here comes the excuse train to avoid sleepy-time.", I thought.  But instead when I answered, "Yes?" I received this response: "Mommy, when I get older, will you marry me?"  Well, if that doesn't just make you melt, you've no heart in your chest. I know some of you are thinking I sat down on the bed and cautiously explained all the reasons that didn't make sense or how in real life, that would never happen - and if that's what you're thinking, then you're wrong.   "Of course I will" was my response.  He smiled with heavy eyelids, nodded slowly, and faded off into slumber.

You don't forget those moments.  Not ever.  Cameron is 19 now and even as I type this, it is vivid in my mind, food for my soul, and brings tears to my eyes.  Since that moment, I've seen Cameron grow into a man any girl would love to marry.  He has heard devastating diagnoses and taken them with grace, come close to death a few times and testified accordingly, has such a strong faith and is not ashamed to say so, and climbed more mountains than any thrill seeker - and made it to the top every time.  He's so handsome (he's ROCKED both a 'fro AND a faux-hawk), strong like an ox, and his heart is just the right amount of tender.  And this is not the biased writing of the mother of a Momma's Boy, either.

Well......yes, it is.

Now Cameron and I have a very special relationship.  We've stood by each other through thick and thin.  But a few years ago, we were in the car together and I was feeling nostalgic and taking a stroll down memory lane.  "Awww, Cam.  Do you remember when you were little and you asked me to marry you?"  He smiled wryly, and put his hand on top of mine on the middle console of the car.  "Yyyyyeeaa...about that, Mom......I don't think it's gonna work out."  (Not exactly left at the altar, but dumped just the same!)

It is a cute follow-up to an adorable story, I know.  But the story doesn't end there at all.  Cameron continues to do whatever he feels he must to take care of me, protect me, and truly love me.  He is proud I'm his mom, though my mistakes have been many; and I am proud of him as my son, though the frustrations have been, too.

I pray for him daily.  I pray protection from evil and all wicked intent, and I pray he continues to grow in strength in his faith.  I pray he finds the RIGHT woman to marry, one whose faith mirrors his, so that their union is strong and clean.  I pray I can hold those special memories in my heart and mind for as long as I'm alive.  And I pray my legacy is great in his heart and mind as long as he's alive....and I pray he rises up, and calls me blessed.

And of course, I pray he's Mr. Right for the girl of his dreams - that he does whatever he feels he must to take care of her, protect her, and truly love her......and that his proposal leads them into exciting nuptials and wedded bliss true love stories are made of.

Don't take one trial or test of faith for granted.  Even the worst of days are meant to raise you with moxie and help you learn to relish the good ones.  And when a proposal is presented to you, be sure to carefully consider it before saying no.  It could be the transfer of some of your journey to someone else's path, all while building the legacy you leave behind.